Why I'm Retiring at 37

I wish I could say we won the lottery or came into a lot of money or my wife got a killer new job that pays so well I don't have to work, but no.  It's all about time.  I work eight to five Monday to Friday, my wife works about the same maybe longer sometimes.  In the evenings and on the weekend she runs her home business, arbonne.  It helps and her earnings there are slowly growing but it takes a lot of her time.  This leaves me as a full-time worker and a full-time dad.

I hate weekends.  It's incredibly stressful to watch weekend after weekend wasted catching up on chores and running around that just can't get done during the week.  We have no family time, no us time and no me time.  Enough is enough!

We have two kids in daycare which eats more than half my salary (my wife makes more than me) and at the end of March my contract is to be renewed.  If it doesn't get renewed I qualify for E.I. with that and no daycare we are further ahead.  Why would I keep working?  Why am I letting someone else care for my kids just to get a few more dollars that aren't enough anyway?

So, unless something really good comes my way with my job on April 1st I am retiring!  I'm calling it that because if all goes well with arbonne and if I get to spend more time writing I do not plan to join the work force again ever.

The thought of being able to get current weekend stuff out of the way during the week, being able to squeeze in more writing time and being able to support my wife more in her business is really exciting.  I have to admit I'm a little scared too.  Short term we are better off financially but the future has a few ifs.  I just have to believe in what we can do.

Thanks for reading

I am going to get a children's story published… PIII

Well, I just have to get an unbiased read through from someone who doesn't know me well (or sleep with me :-) ).

Next I have to write a really kick-a$$ cover letter and send it off.

Is it too early to be excited?  I have decided that I will not be rejected!  That should waylay the doubt for at least three months.

I am going to get a children's story published… PII

Dear readers, it has been two hours since I last confessed…

Perhaps writing what I am going to do first is a good way of actually doing it.  After I wrote my last blog I began researching publishing children's books.  This is what I found:

“So You Want to Publish a Children’s Book: Advice from an Insider” by Victoria Fanning
Some words of wisdom on submitting your work.  Most importantly it answered my question of whether or not it needed to be illustrated.  The answer was an overwhelming NO!

"How to format your manuscript for a children's book" by Cynthea Lui

A step by step guide to how exactly to format your children's book for submission.  Typical double-spaced times new roman nothing fancy.

I also found two three publishing houses that are taking unsolicited manuscripts for children's book:

Houghton Mifflin Harcourt

Boyd Mills Press
Orca Book Pulbishers (Canada Only)

As well as a good list of others that aren't quite what I was looking for but still good to know

So, I have formatted my story as per Cynthea's advice, stopped worrying about the artwork.  I now have two other things to do.

Get someone to look over my manuscript for mistakes/grammer etc. and find out if I can submit to both of these places.  I have heard that some PHs only want you to submit only to them.  

For the record, if you are going to take 3+ months to get back to the submitter (which I completely understand) I don't think it's fair that they have to wait for an answer/non-answer before submitting to someone else.  I know that you believe someone is wasting your time if they submit to multiple places and may decide not to go with you but it is only the time it takes to read/think/write a letter as opposed to three months of waiting.

Here is my goal.  To have my manuscript in the mail to someone by Friday!  Luckily I have two great editors by way of my wife who is an elementary school teacher and my friend Allison who has an English degree.

Broken ankles are far worse than the pain

Who knew that a fairly minor injury coud turn out to be such a pain in the ass?

Last weekend, on a particularly hot day we decided that we desperately needed to get out of our house and head to somewhere with air conditioning.  My wife, Toni gathered up a few odds and ends (diaper bag, cold drink cups for Starbucks Frappuccinos) while I loaded the kids into our overly hot car.
As I was about to put our son into the car I spotted a lady walking the cutest brindle French Bulldog.  We talked to her and my wife was walking down the path.  Suddenly things went flying.
"I think I broke my ankle."  She said, without uttering as much as a single "F"-word (colour me impressed).  She laid on the ground half sobbing and rocking.  She was almost as panic stricken as our poor neighbour with the dog who asked a few times if we needed her to call 911.
I did what I always do in these kinds of situations which was think it isn't as bad as it looks and just remain calm and figure out what to do (and generally taking too long to set a plan in motion).
I got the kids loaded into the car then drove as close as I could to Toni, without running her over (which would have made the situation far worse, although if done right would have alleviated much pain) and very carefully loaded her into our small car and drove to the hospital.
Luckily her brother was at a baseball game close to the hospital so he was able to get a ride there with his girlfriend and stay with Toni while I looked after the kids.  His girlfriend also was able to come back with me and grab a car so Toni and George could get home.
I was still hopeful that it wasn't as serious as we thought, a twisted ankle, perhaps a sprain.
I got the call.  It was broken.  Okay, no big deal.
Later: May need surgery, oh crap
Still later: No surgery, oh thank God.

After a supper of hotdogs and then putting both kids to bed (not an easy task with a five month old and a toddler that insists having three books read to him, three songs sung and various other things that usually make for a 45 minute - 1 hour bedtime routine on a good day) she returned.
I have seen a number of people with casts lately.  They have these airboot things, it looks like a giant shoe and they hobble around a bit but still pretty mobile.  Toni had told me on the phone that the doctor told her of all the bones to break that the lateral malleolus (the end of the fibula) is one of the best.

BULL-FUCKIN'-SHIT

I was expecting to see Toni gingerly walking up the steps on our deck, looking forlorn but all in all not so worse for wear, I didn't think they even did crutches anymore.  Guess what, they do, and guess what, she had them.

"Aw shit!"  I said to myself, realizing immediately what this meant, our children's primary care-giver was out of commission  not even light duties.  About the only thing she was going to be able to look after was feeding our five month old and even then only if she felt up to it.  She had to keep her leg elevated, she couldn't put any weight on it at all.  They couldn't even tell her how long it would take to heal, a progress exam in two weeks was what she was left with.

I still had four days of holidays left so I called my boss and booked the week off.

I hate to toot my own horn but as a guy I am pretty capable around the house, I can cook, don't mind changing diapers, know where the cleaning supplies are and can take orders fairly well (had this been my father…)

Throughout the week I actually got on a pretty good flow, the kids were angels (as they usually are), I managed to get them out of the house for at least an hour everyday, I prepped meals in the morning and tried to have lots of left overs stockpiled and didn't let things get out of control.  All-in-all I think the week was a great success (I do one day soon hope to be a full time stay at home Dad and this week told me I could probably handle it).

Yesterday I dropped Toni and the kids off with my parents about an hour and a half away for the week so two weeks down.  So far so good but what is going to happen now?

A week is about all my parents can handle with both kids, they may keep our three year old for a bit longer but he's actually pretty independent.  I see a future of hell, the next two months are going to be beyond anything I think I will be able to imagine and I can't afford to take anymore time off work.

To say I am concerned about what will happen is an understatement.

First of all my wife is not a home body.  She needs to get out of the house occasionally.  She broke the ankle on her driving foot, she won't be able to drive for quite sometime (doesn't help that our car is a standard).  To make matters worse she was just getting going with a personal trainer and going to the gym a lot and loving it, this just set that back as well as her mood, poor thing.  At least she got a pedicure just before she broke her ankle.

It's summertime, sitting inside on a cold winter day is bad enough, when it's nice outside and you can't walk it's like dying of thirst on a sandy beach.  You can see water, it just can't help you.  This goes for Toni and the kids, at least we have a good sized backyard, but at three Malcolm still needs a lot of supervision outside and someone to be able to jump at a moments notice.  I can't even pick up all the slack because there will be a million neglected things.

So, I made a decision.  I decided that on top of feeling sorry for Toni, and the kids, that for once it is okay to feel sorry for myself a little bit too in this situation, which is why I wrote this.

I'm done now.

Also to my friends on G+/Twitter/Goodreads/Threadless/Outside World, my apologies if I am too busy to interact with you much in the coming months.  I'm sure you will understand, if not, try breaking your wife's ankle when you have two kids under 3 :-D

Thanks for Reading

D. Ryan Leask

Harper Collins/Penguin/Steadpress here I come! (someday, maybe)



I'm going to have to come to terms with the fact that I am terrible at self promotion.  This was my biggest downfall when I self-published through a vanity press (I just remembered what they're called, I also try not to think that I actually did this because it makes it sound like I was naïve and taken advantage of, which I may have been).  It's not that I don't enjoy promoting myself, I loved doing readings and book signings and would love to do more. I am not shy and I think I'm a born public speaker and incredibly outgoing.  The problem is that I have difficulty setting these things up.  It's difficult to explain where the problem lies.  If everything is set up for me, if I am told I need to be somewhere for a signing or a reading I will go, I will sign, I will read, smile, shake hands, greet people.  A reading is my favourite as the crowd has come specifically to hear me talk.  Signings are harder, especially if I am expected to leave my post or get people to come to me.  I am not a salesman, I am a writer, I will chat anyone up that wants to talk to me, but if they don't specifically want to, I feel like a dork (perhaps it's my lack of retail experience).
Even promoting on twitter feels wrong. I always think I am clogging up the twitterverse and my friends feeds with junkmail.  How much more advertising do I have to do there? I can't even seem to give away copies of my Novella "Counting Down the Storm" (which is available on Smashwords for FREE with the coupon code: JN54B until June 27). I find that when I try to do self promotion I do it in such a sheepish nature that I likely don't get anyone's attention or use humor which if it does lead someone to look at the story they realize that it isn't something humorous and they step away.
The other issue is time.  When I'm not doing my full time job, helping my wife raise our two very young kids, taking care of our two dogs, keeping up with repairs and renovations on an older home, attempting to keep our yard from growing an old car on blocks or writing I am sleeping.  I'm not sure where I would fit in enough time to convince people to buy my books.
It is obvious to me by the lack of response I am getting, lack of sales, lack of reviews and lack of any form of excitement, that I am doing something wrong (even if it's the writing, someone should have said by now, "shut up your book stinks").  I am not giving up on "Counting Down the Storm" (which is available on Smashwords for FREE with the coupon code: JN54B until June 27) though, I will keep doing what I am doing and hope to get at least some interest going.  I still hate to give it away though and after June 27th won't do another freebie for a while.

So, I have come to a conclusion (which will likely change by the time I hit PUBLISH POST and then three-hundred and fourteen thousand times from there until my current WIP is complete), I am going to attempt to get traditionally published next time. Writing Query letters, submitting samples, researching agencies and spending time on the wrong end of restraining orders from agents, can not be as much work as trying to get a few thousand people to read my self-published novel. I think the 15% royalty I will make will be worth it, after all that's not much better than you get at Amazon, and they give you nothing in return.


So fair warning Harper Collins/Penguin/Steadpress you shall know my name (it will be on that list of people that aren't allowed in your building)


Thanks for Reading
D. Ryan Leask

Live and Let Live With My Snooze Button and Thanks for Reading

I had a minor argument with my wife over my writing.  Basically I was mad because I wanted to do some writing when she wanted me to do some something other than writing thing.  It was silly because it was something that is more important.  So I had to make a decision, what are the important things in my life that get in the way of my writing?
#1: My Family

Why: Two children under the age of 3, a wife who works full time (or will again after her maternity leave ends in 11-½ months), two dogs that need walking and a zillion projects around the house that need to be done
Solution: Find time when they are not around to write or get away from it all.

#2: Work

Why:  I work a regular 9-5 (okay 8:15-4:30) job.  My work load isn't that great and I do sneak in a chance to write now and then, actually way too much and I'm afraid I could get busted especially because our computers are apparently heavily monitered, which I doubt.
Solution: Feel that I am getting enough writing done that I don't need to do any at work, save work for work and do a little bit of research/networking on breaks from work.

#3: Sleep

Why: I like my sleep, eight to nine hours of uninterupted sleep keeps me sane, anything less makes me irritable, inattentive and overly dependant on stimuli (coffee/sugar don't worry, nothing too damaging).
Solution: Well our daughter is now just over two weeks old so am I getting (anything close to) eight hours of sleep a night?  Hell no, why don't I just get up at 6 a.m. and write?  She gets up then anyway and therefor I'm awake and by the time I'd get back to sleep it would be time to get up anyways.
Excuse: I'm not awake enough to be productive.
Suck it Up: I have lots written down that hasn't been put to type so I don't even really have to think and I'm sure after some dedication and getting used to being up at 6 a.m. this will change.

What am I really giving up in the longrun?  I may have to go to bed a little earlier, so what, miss some TV watching?  The kids should be in bed by 7-8 anyways and I'll still get some cuddle time with the wife.  What I am really giving up is sleeping longer in the morning, it's a habit, and a bad one and if I want to take my life and my writing more seriously it's time to grow up act like a man with two kids, a family, a real job and a passion for writing.

Besides, someday my snooze button is gonna hit me back!

-----

So I really want to sign off every blog with the same thing.  I sign my books, if they aren't too personalized, Thanks for Reading.  I thought it is kind of lame but when I try anything else it just doesn't feel the same.  I gave it some serious consideration and I am going to make it my Thing.  First of all it says two things, thanks for reading my book, and thanks for reading in general.  I think that the art of reading is fading.  There are many entertainment portals these days and I'm not sure of the actual stats, I'm sure that reading isn't very high on any of those lists.  As an "entertainer" in that field I just want to say, thanks for chosing this medium for your entertainment needs and chosing me specifically to fulfill them.  So to all that ever have or will ever read anything,

Thanks for Reading!

D. Ryan Leask
Author of Counting Down the Storm
and other unpublished/unfinished works

New Baby Girl!

Yeap.

It seems to me that I really started getting heavily involved in my writing before my son was born too then it just dwindled as I decided to reroute my writing time into fathering time.  I hope that's not going to happen again.  I want to be able to manage my time far better for all of my loves!

That is all I have to say for now.

My Little Sister is an Alien

So other than my almost Daily Threadless slogans the only other writing I have been able to complete is a children's story I wrote for my son. Called:

MY SISTER IS AN ALIEN

It was written to kind of give him some ideas of what it's going to be like to be a big brother which is going to happen in less than three weeks!

The gist of the story is that Max thinks his little sister is an alien because she is nothing like him and does all sorts of weird things.

I am doing a rough draft of all the art too but I'm not very artistic so I am stealing it from the Web. If I ever think about getting this published I'll have to find an artist.

Hopefully I will have it finished before baby comes.

TTFN