My Writing Creed

I listened to a webinar hosted by Jeff Goins a little while ago that was incredibly inspiring to me. There was nothing new that he said that I didn't already know but just the way he said it, how he pieced all of those thoughts that I've had, things that I learned and writing beliefs that I held into this wonderful picture that made me believe that:

I AM A WRITER!!

One of the biggest things I got from his talk was that you write for yourself first, never worry about who will read it or what they'll think of it. If you love writing YA then write YA but if you are only doing it because it's popular right now and it will be your best chance at getting published then for God's sake

STOP FUCKING WRITING RIGHT NOW!!

He had a lot of other great tips as well, one of them was about creating a writing space. In theory this should be easy, find a spot in your house, fill it with inspiring pictures, quotes items as so forth. I would love to do this but unfortunately there is no where in the house that I could call my own. Also in the spirit of Mr. Goins I decided not to make excuses but instead find solutions so I am making a portable office!

I have a mailbag, leather file folder, pens, pencils, notebooks and my archaic netbook (which when at home I will attach to a monitor and keyboard). I am printing out my creed and putting it in a frame along with pictures of my family. I am also going to get a Lego figurine (long story) as my coach. Also in my portable office will be my worn copy of The World According to Garp and a Webster's Dictionary. No matter where I am writing I will set up my office and that will be my space (okay, it may be a little awkward on the bus if I start bussing to work).

Now, about my writing creed. That picture has the authors that have inspired me, 

• Ernest Hemingway - his beautiful way with words that were sparse yet never lacking.
• Hunter S. Thompson - Truly gonzo and never giving a fuck about what people wanted him to write but instead wrote exactly what he felt needed to be written
• Stephen King - The first really adult author I got into and still love to this day
• A. Lee Martinez - He takes characters and settings to places that completely turn the rules of fantasy on its head without breaking them
• Steve Umstead - His style and skills with SciFi are as great as any contemporarily published author yet he is independent. He opened up the world of self-publishing to me.
• Everette Powers - Another independent author who made me believe that I didn't need to be traditionally published to be read and also someone who proves that self published authors are truly as great as their traditionally published peers, if not better.

My other inspiration is The World According to Garp by John Irving. I bought the copy you see in that poster while I was in the Solomon Islands at a used book store. I have probably read it at least ten times and each time I read it I love it more. The character of T.S. Garp resonates with me as a writer and although his backstory is nothing like mine (I grew up with two loving parents and have never been to Vienna) his writing style and voice is very similar to mine or perhaps I have unconsciously emulated him, either way as a writer I relate more to him than any real writer.

My creed:

There Are Over 7 Billion People In This World

One Of Them Is Bound To Like My Shitty Prose

I Will Write For Them

What it means is that somewhere someone is going to like what I write and I only need to write for them as opposed to writing for the masses. It also means that even if I am the only one who likes "My Shitty Prose" then that's fine I will write for myself.

I hope that my favourite readers will take a moment and go to Jeff Goins' blog. If you sign up you get a really great download called The Writer's Manifesto.

I think it would be great if all writer's made their own creed, if you do one please share it, I would love to see it!

Thanks for Reading

When Words Collide, Day 1

When Words Collide 2014

Calgary, Ab

     I could easily start at the beginning, or at the end or somewhere in the middle but D. J. McIntosh, SG Wong (sgwong.com), Wayne Arthurson and Clare C.Marshall all said that a manuscript needs the action to hit right away (unfortunately it didn’t and their hands went up despite the excellent reading skills of Susan Forest). That was Live Action Slush – Mystery Edition at When Words Collide.

     I was speaking with SG Wong at the end of the day to thank her for her words about my story, she asked me which story was mine but I was too embarrassed to say so:

SG Wong, if you read this it was “Killing Gavin Petters.” I had over described Gavin Petters being philosophical and called a chair an occasional (Something which I must rectify).

(I hope that was “actiony” enough to grab you, dear reader.)

     I don’t want to give much background other than saying it’s a writing conference in Calgary that happened August 8-10, 2014. I first heard about it over a year ago; my wife mentioned it to me and said, “You need to go to get Dianna Gabaldon’s autograph.”

     I imagined the conference to be like a trade show, only for writers. There would be rooms filled with 400 Diana Gabaldon fans, 80 self-help/motivational writers, 16 hotel guests who stumbled in looking for the bar and 4 people like me whom I would never find in the crowd. Jumping to conclusions without research is dangerous (trust me, it’s the way I write, finish the story, then research and pray to God that you can either twist reality or the story enough to fit without breaking it completely). I had no desire to attend, I had my writing event, NaNoWriMo.

     Now fast forward several months. A writer’s group I had joined (but didn't find was the right fit for me) shifted gears, took a hard left and “threw all the dogs out the back”. I returned to what is now the World Famous (my own little world) Montparnasse Group. 

     Long story short… Barbie “MsBurb” Thompson the organizer and most motivating person I know (that has nothing to withhold from me if I don’t do what I'm told) said, “You are finishing your first draft, perfecting the first three chapters and pitching at When Words Collide.”

     I will admit that it wasn't that out of thin air, we had been discussing goals and I mentioned that I may be able to do something like that, perhaps, if I found time, and/or if I . She doesn't do excuses. I did it, although the “perfecting the first three chapters” part is extremely open to interpretation.

(I’m sure if you had read this far you are likely guessing how my pitch went considering the “quality of this post.” Someday I will write one about why you should never judge an author by his blog especially when coming to grammar, spelling, and, punctuation.)

     Nothing on the pitch stuff yet, I wish to be chronological and the pitch was Friday at 5:30 I started the conference Thursday night.

     Every other Thursday is when we convert the Crown Plaza Hotel into La Rotonde. That Thursday was our Thursday. Rick Northy (no link, tsk, tsk), the co-founding member of our group and Barbie both had rooms at The Carriage House Inn. I did not, a mistake which I hope not to make next year. We had a beer at the lounge and went for a second upstairs on the tenth floor. 

     It just so happened that Jack Whyte was staying on the same floor. Barbie made some small talk regarding drinking to which he laughed and said something further, which I do not recall, then she said, “Oh my God, you’re Jack Whyte.” Or something like that.

     Now, I am a complete ass because I did not research who the big guests were (I mean I saw their names but didn't check out their backgrounds). Perhaps that was a good thing because other than knowing that Jack Whyte was an important enough author to be the head-liner of the show I knew nothing, which came in handy the next day.

     I won’t get into the discussions that we had following or Barbie and Rick’s stories of the pre-conference goings on although they are quite funny.

    The following morning I arrived back at the Carriage House at 8:00 solely to be sure that I was there in time to sign up for a pitch session (which I was very frustrated to find out the night before had a pre-sign up that I had somehow missed). Instead of sitting around however I decided (talked into by Barbie) to go to a manuscript session with none other than Jack Whyte. Of course you were supposed to hand in your manuscript well before the session was to start but seeing as I didn't know I was going…

     Key things I learned from this session:

• Jack likes long flowing sentences
•  hates when you use a person’s name too much (especially if there’s less than three people in the room
• he makes every story come alive with his rich baritone voice and Scottish accent.

     As with all of the other sessions I went to I will have to do a brain dump which will likely consist of a kabrillion blog posts of information mostly just to solidify what I learnt.

     Oh, and Jack did read part of the second chapter of my Novel which I hope didn't give him nightmares (my story revolves around an author who kills his agent, editor and publisher, he read the part where the author is unceremoniously dumped by all three).

     During one of the breaks I managed to get slotted in for a pitch session (at 5:30 with the fantastic Brian Hades of EDGE Science Fiction and Fantasy Publishing . One small issue was that Jack had held onto my manuscript which I had (stupidly) only printed one copy of and I wasn't about to ask for it back, I don’t care if he was planning to just use it for fire starter (I debated sliding chapter one under his hotel room door but Barbie decided that would be a little creepy (however coming from someone who replaced Tom Jones with Jack Whyte as her… well you can guess what list a middle aged woman has Tom Jones on, maybe I should have taken her advice with a grain of salt (you aren't supposed to use a bracket within a bracket but I don’t care))).

     Luckily Rick had bought a printer just for such emergencies and after harrowing issues of technology (computer problems, Internet access) I managed to reprint my three chapters.

     I went to two great sessions, wrote down what I needed to say for my pitch.

     “Hi my name is… …My novel is called Death By Putts. It’s about an author who murders his agent, publisher and editor.”

     *Dramatic pause

     Believe it or not security didn't come and the pitch went really well! Let’s just say that it’s a good thing I got those chapters printed out.

     I don’t think I can do a brief overview of the conference all in this one post so I will save the rest for another time.

*****

I miss you Dori,  06/04/13-14/08/09

I hate ending this post on a sad note but just before I gave my pitch I received a phone call from my wife informing me that she had to take our Bull Mastiff, Dori, to the vet. She hadn't been feeling quite right for a couple of days but nothing too far out of the ordinary; even just that morning, although she wasn't full of P&V, she seemed to be okay. We received a call early the following day that she was indeed in very poor shape. Although there were some options for us none were very good and we had to make the heart-breaking decision to let her go. She passed peacefully late Saturday morning with her head in my lap.

When I completely come to grips with this loss I will probably write a post about it on my parenting blog but for now it’s all I can do just to mention this. I feel that I have to though; focusing just on the joy of the weekend makes me feel selfish and guilty.

Draft #1 COMPLETE and a little fun with query letters

I don't even remember when I started working on this novel. I'm sure I have it marked down somewhere but it doesn't really matter, it was a long time ago. As some of you may know I had it pretty much done once before and then through the power of technology (read quirks) I lost over half of it. I'm happy about that actually. The story is better for it.

So, tonight at 11:42pm I wrote "The End" (actually, I didn't, perhaps I should, anyway…). I'm very proud of myself and the story I managed to puke out. At times, like tonight, it flowed out effortlessly, page after page of text and story, other times it felt like I had to drag my MC behind a bus with a chain. I'm sure I'll see those pages clearly when I edit. That is the next part.

So, if any of you want to know what my story is about, here is a synopsis:

DEATH BY PUTTS

Ed Putts is a middle of the road author, or so he believes and although his books have hit the best sellers list those around him keep telling him that is nothing overly special so he keeps plugging away. He gets paid just enough to make a living for himself in his small condo on the outskirts of the city.

One day Ed gets pulled into a meeting with his agent. He finds himself meeting with his editor and publisher as well and they drop the hammer on him. He's done. No more books, no more money, nothing. His series that he is in the middle of will just end. To top it all of a rotten contract has meant that not only do his books and characters no longer belong to him but neither does his name.

He can't write.

Although he is an established writer he finds himself having to try to start over again with no success.

Ed has made a name for himself writing a series about a suave and intelligent serial killer named Gavin Petters. Gavin Petters is Ed's portal to his own dark psychotic impulses. All of those who had supported his writing have sealed it off. It is just a matter of time before the pressure gets too strong.

A pretty, yet unbalanced woman enters his life and pushes him further down into his dark mind. When he kills her in self defense during a masochistic sexual encounter it sets off a series of events that shows him how dark he really is.

My apologies if the above is somewhat poorly written, it is late and I may have been drinking a little but hopefully it gives you an idea of what I have been doing.

WARNING: The following may contain some sarcasm :-D
So, now that I have finished my novel what am I going to do? What any first time novelist would do who hasn't done any homework, I'm going to query. I already have a list of 75 agents that I am going to send letters to, here is my standard form letter I am going to send:

Dear To Whom It May Concern:
My name is D. Ryan Leask and I have just finished writing my very first novel. As I'm sure you can understand it takes a lot of work to accomplish this feat so therefor anyone who has achieved it must truly be special as I'm sure you will see that I am.

My book is about a writer that kills a bunch of literary people who try to keep him from writing, so you'll likely be able to relate and I know this will be a winner with you for sure!

I haven't bothered doing any editing as I know that you provide such services for me when you chose to represent me, after all I am an author not an editor, lol.

I know it said on your website to send only a query letter/sample chapter but I have included the entire novel to save you the trouble of all the back and forth banter which we likely both agree is pointless.  I have one request. It said that I shouldn't expect an answer for quite some time but we both know this is just to keep those that have a really terrible novel from bothering you constantly. I have sent this letter out to a number of other agents so the sooner I hear back the sooner I can look through all the offer letters and give you an answer.  I'm certain that asking for at least a high five figure advance would be prudent.

I appreciate your time and look forward to hearing from you very soon.
Sincerely,

Author of Death By Putts

I am going to get a children's story published… PVI

Response 1 of 3

I like that they acknowledged that it was a form letter.
One down, two to go.

I have decided that after I hear back/run out of time with these queries I'm going to get myself an agent.

Chuck Wendig, you have inspired me!

• If you are under 18, disregard the following advice (for legal reasons)
• If you are a writer and offended by strong language get over yourself
• If you are a writer and you do not follow @ChuckWendig you must
• If you are a writer and you do not read Chuck Wendig's Blog (Terrible Minds) Do it
• If you do not have the poster below:
• posted as your desktop
• tacked up on a wall above your computer
• Embroidered into a quilt on your bed
• or tattooed across your chest

©2013 Chuck Wendig

• You have to
• If his blog hasn't inspired you to write more, sorry but the only thing left is this:

I don't write #SciFi… or do I?

For some reason lately I have been thinking a lot about the NaNoWriMo story I wrote in 2011.  When I was done I hated it.  It was supposed to be a sexy, funny space adventure full of quirky characters with a little bit of political and societal commentary.  It was none of the above.  I just seemed to dredge on and on without hitting the marks.  My characters were indeed quirky but never lived up to their potential and even though I created a whole universe and laws and so forth ─The Complete Idiots Guide To The Universe (And Beyond)─ I just couldn't do it.  Maybe it's because I wasn't a fan of SciFi as a kid.  I am now but not with the same love as someone who was a fan all their lives.

Another issue is that writing comedy is hard.  I think I'm a pretty funny guy (feel free to disagree with me) but keeping that up through a whole novel is really hard.  I have read very few books that were truly funny, James Herriot comes to mind as does this gem by Christopher David Petersen called What The Hell's Up With Heaven?

It was so taxing writing this and I was so disappointed with the end result that I took a break from writing for a month (which turned into a whole year).  During this time I lost most of my writing in an unfortunate series of events including a crashed laptop which I used to back everything up (this was ironic as I don't store anything on my writing laptop because I'm always afraid it is going to implode and never does) as well as a flash drive that decided it was going to take all my files and translate them into gibberish.  I wasn't to sad about losing my NaNo story.  Now I am.  Maybe it's that absence makes the heart grow fonder (or is it absinthe makes the smart go wronger anyway…).

What I really should be doing now if focusing on my current WIP and just letting this one ferment but I can't help it so I am going to take a moment here to introduce you to that SciFi story I was working on and maybe later I will come back here and look at this and it will kick-start a new story.

James Styne Goes To Space (working title)

Synopsis:

James Styne is a career soldier in the Earth Navy Mars division and in his vary last year of being eligible to be the commander of his own ship.  His career had been halted by an unfortunate incident with a Generals daughter during his training and has plagued him ever since.  Running out of excuses his superiors finally assign him a ship and crew but do so with the full intention of failing.  The ship is a relic from the Americas and his crew are a bunch of misfits that the Navy has been hiding because they don't know what else to do with them.

The Good Guys

Characters:

Name: James Styne

Rank: Captain - Probationairy

Race: Human

Home Planet: Earth

A womanizing smart ass who questions authority.  He is the greatⁿ grandson of Allan Bartholomew Ian Styne, the greatest mind in history and the man that actually uncovered the truth of the universe.  He wrote The Complete Idiots Guide To The Universe (And Beyond).

Name: Reggie Cross

Rank: 1st Mate

Race: Human

Home Planet: Mars

Best friend of James since military school who rose through the ranks and joined the training program.  He joins James' crew to save James from himself taking a rank reduction in the process.

Name: Crissy Blane

Rank: Civilian - Empath

Race: Unknown Humanoid

Home Planet: Unknown Found on Mars

Crissy Blane is an empath but with severe limitations.  She can read minds but only if she is connected to the person sexually and them to her.  She can see the future however when she has a vision she goes into a convulsive orgasm and is unable to communicate until after the event has happened.

Name: Howard LaMonde

Rank: Private - Mechanic

Race: Formerly Human

Home Planet: Earth

Jake Howard is a ghost that has been attached to the ship, ENM Washington D.C. since he died in an unfortunate accident over a hundred years before.  No one including him knows why he didn't cross over to the beyond.  The army had no protocols for what to do with a trapped spirit and were unable to release him from service involuntarily so they were forced to keep him.  He is more useful than you would think as he can travel throughout circuitry.  He is able to use and move objects even though he is completely transparent.

Name: Gork

Rank: Private - Gunner

Race: Gork

Home Planet: Unknown

Gork is a seven foot tall three hundred and fifty pound hairy beast with short horns and an extremely limited vocabulary (I had actually created a gork/english dictionairy).  No one is quite sure where he came from or even how he ended up in the Navy.  His job as a gunner is to man the turret guns which are housed in a pod designed for a small human but for some reason Gork loves it in there even though he can barely move.  He even sleeps in his turret.

Name: Brian

Rank: 1st Officer - Helmsman

Race: Zygod

Home Planet: Unpronounceable (The actual official name the Milky Way Alliance gives it, only Zygods are able to say the actual name)

The Zygod's planet is just on the outside of the territory of the Milky Way Alliance (MWA) and are enemys.  Brian's father was a prisoner but what they didn't know was that, A) Male Zygods carry the children and B)Brian's father was pregnant.  He is very humanized with an affinity for 20th century Earth culture including 1970s rock and roll and pot.

Name: Sippertawn "Zippy" Ironthorpe

Rank: 1st Officer - Navigator

Race: Ironeze

Home Planet: Carbondale

Zippy's planet was destroyed by an asteroid but some of it's inhabitants were saved by the MWA.  At first the carbon-based refugees, Carbonics were believed to be the true inhabitants and the Ironeze thought to be robots as they were metal and filled with wires and ran on electricity.  The Carbonics were actually built by the Ironeze with artificial intelligence who had seen a chance at their survival by easily convincing their rescuers that they were in fact the true natives of the planet.  Many Ironeze were either not rescued or destroyed before the ruse was uncovered.  Zippy is one of only fifty Ironeze that exist.  His home planet had electricity in the air like Earth has air and must recharge himself regularly to survive.

Name: Theresa Godall

Rank: Private - Communications Officer

Race: Human

Home Planet: Mars

Former lover and current caretaker of Crissy Blane.  She is the only one who can detect with even mild certainty what Crissy's prognostications mean.  She is also a former one-night stand of Reggie's.

The Bad Guys

Name: General Maxwell Gregg

Rank: General, three stars

Race: Human

Home Planet: Earth

James had had a sexual encounter with his daughter resulting in a pregnancy which James never knew about. General Gregg has done everything in his power to try to court marshall or dishonorbly discharge James including plans which had resulted in his own inability to obtain his fourth star and be able to relocate back to his beloved Earth.

Name: Super-General Octavid

Rank: Super-General (Octopus Revolutionairy Army)

Race: Octopus

Home Planet: Earth

Within fifty years of social experiments on the highly intelligent octopuses they have formed a society which unbeknown to humans is attempting to take over the world.  Super-General Octavid is the leader of this movement.  His ability to not give in to his sexual compulsions has granted him a very long life (male octopuses die after ejaculation).  He has been pretending to be an ally to the MWA but only so that he can place spies throughout the organization.  He has had little success until he befriends General Gregg and convinces him to allow an ambassador to join the crew of the Washington D.C.  Octopuses can communicate with each other over infinite distances using telepathy.

The Ship

The ENM Washington D.C. was formerly the USS Washington.  It was in service before the Earth became one central government.  It is outfitted with similarly speced propulsion systems of modern ships however no one with the exception of Howard LaMonde knows how to repair them and as it was made in a secret factory on Mars which was destroyed during the American uprising no parts are available.  All of the systems are in an antiquated measuring system called the US customary units which cause great confusion.

Writing all of this has got me thinking again, dammit!  "FOCUS ON YOUR CURRENT WIP"

Anyway…

I'm sure we all have lost projects that keep popping into our heads, what is yours?

Thanks for Reading

Why I ♥ Pantsing

I like to read.  I am a compulsive reader and usually can't put a book down until it's finished because I just NEED to know what happens next.  I have never read the end of a book before starting it ever.  This is why I love pantsing.

Everyone has their own opinion this is a great post by my good friend Everett Powers on plotting (or outlining as I call it).  Obviously not every one falls into the two categories neatly, some do both to varying degrees, even I do but not until I've completed my first draft.

I only ever start a book with an idea a premise and a loose plot, sometimes even just a good line like one of my neglected WIPs started with this:

I was just finishing up a case I was working on, the case was scotch and I'd nearly gotten to the bottom of it.

When I started writing that I had no clue where it was going, still don't really and I'm about 75% of my way through.

To me pantsing is kind of like the "Choose Your Own Adventure" books I loved when I was younger.  You control what everyone is doing and where they will go but only when you get to a certain point and then everything works itself out from there (hopefully).  The fastest way for me to lose interest in a project is to figure out how it is going to end long before I get there.  If I do I quickly change direction and steer it away to some other unknown conclusion.  Things pop up as I write, interesting thoughts or situations that hadn't occurred to me until that moment and if I had outlined I may have skipped over them or tried to include them in some awkward way.  I'm excited to write this way, I can't wait until I find out what happens next.

In my current WIP my MC was planning to commit a murder to steer the cops away from him as a suspect for another one.  Until I wrote the words 

"He was surprised to return to his apartment and see four uniformed policemen and Tim standing at the door."

I had no idea they were going to be there.  It wasn't outside of the realm of possibilities but it certainly threw a monkey wrench into his (my) plans for what was going to happen next.  I can't wait to find out what it is and I hope that someday when you're reading it neither can you.

Just a side note.  I had already finished a first draft of this WIP and outlined it then lost most of the end of the draft.  I am re-writing it and guess what, I may as well throw that outline out the window because suddenly my characters aren't doing what they did last time, which is good because I already knew the old ending, now I get a new one!

How do you write and why?  I'd love to know!

Thanks for Reading

PitMad -Why my novel was likely a tough sell.

I may as well hit myself over the head with a hammer…

#PitMad Writer of Serial Killer Series Kills his Agent, Editor and Publisher when they cancel his contract and ruin his career.

That was my pitch to #PitMad, looking at it now they likely think it is a joke post, or a threat but seriously, this is what my story is about.  Here is a little run down of it, not that anyone on the receiving end of #PitMad would go this far to find out more (They have likely all blocked my account by now :D)

Ed Putts is a writer, mildly successful, well, successful enough to pay the bills and write full time.  When his publisher is bought out by a Christian Focused publishing house his gory, sex filled novels no longer fit.  Neither his agent nor publisher have any interest in continuing their relationship with him.

Upon the termination of his contract he discovers that nothing he has written belongs to him and neither is his pen name.  He is an established writer but finds himself thrown back out into the publishing world without a recognizable name, a usable manuscript or an income.  He's fantasizing about murder, nothing new, but instead of writing it down he starts thinking about acting it out.  With a plethora of knowledge about committing and cover-up crimes he begins to believe that he is capable.  A scary encounter with a crazed fan that leads to her death solidifies his belief and he's certain that the only way to be able to get on with his life is to dispose of the three people who ruined it.

Obviously this wouldn't fit in 140 or less.  But here is a question, would this be too much for an agent or publisher to stomach?  Likely, but hell, this is my story, this came out of my brain, what could I do?

Thanks for Reading

Other attempted pitches:
He used to kill fictional characters with his pen,but since his writing career was destroyed his pen will no longer do the trick. #PitMad CF

#PitMad CF What happens when an Author of a series of gory novels about a prolific and careful serial killer has his career destroyed?

If he can’t release his lust for death through writing, there are always other ways, starting with those who killed his career. #PitMad CF

CF→ Imagine a killer whose blood lust is satiated by writing gore, now, imagine what that writer will do if he can no longer write?#PitMad

No bites but my spidey senses tell me… I don't have spidey senses. Let's just say that I was a needle in a needle stack =)

The Writer's Dojo Returns!

The Writer's Dojo is returning to its roots and invites you to join in on the fun! 

When I first started the writer's dojo in 2008, I did it as a way to keep the glory of National Novel Writing Month alive all year long. I loved the camaraderie and support I received during the month of November and desired that same feeling of community every month of the year, in every aspect of writing--not just the drafting.

Beginning February 1st, 2013, the writer's dojo returns to its roots and ushers in a new age of ninjawesomeness. Each month we will open three training rooms at the writer's dojo website. A room for drafters (Writing Month, aka WriMo), a room for revisers (Revising Month, aka ReMo) and a room for those querying (Querying Month, aka QuMo).

We invite you to set your own goals, whether it's to write a thousand words a day, revise ten pages a week, or submit twenty queries in a month, and register your goal in the appropriate training room.

Every Monday we'll post the leaderboard for the previous week, and at the end of each month those who met their goal will be able to post the coveted Writing Ninja Warrior badge on their blog or website.

To help you reach your goals, we have a number of ways to support you:

CHATS: At the dojo every Thursday at 4:00 p.m. Eastern time.

TWITTER: Anytime, day or night, at #writingninja.

GOOGLE+: Join our community for random write-ins and sprints.

NEWSLETTER: Subscribe to our Ninja News and once a month you'll receive an email with an encouraging note and a list of the top performers for the previous month. There will also be opportunities for giveaways, starting with February's newsletter!

We hope to see you at the dojo as you reach for--and achieve--your goals! If you’re interested in seeing what it looks like, just post it in the text box of your blog and then click on “Preview” and you’ll see the simple message=) Please feel free to add your own thoughts on the matter. I’ll see you all around The Writer’s Dojo!!

So what exactly are you doing for me Publishing Company?

The publishing industry has changed drastically over the past decade and because of these changes, authors must now carry the responsibilities of marketing, promotions and publicity for their books. This is a daunting task, and many authors fail, losing their publishing contract or possibly any future contracts. It’s a hard, cold fact … an author’s books must sell and sell well for the publishing machine to keep moving.

SORRY WHAT?
 I saw a post on Twitter from a publishing company that shall remain unnamed and saw the above written there.  I am thoroughly confused.  I'm sorry, if I wanted to carry the responsibilities of marketing, promotions and publicity for my books I would skip you guys altogether and self publish.

Now, to be fair this may be only one companies policy and as very few publishers are taking unsolicited manuscripts getting to the meat of what they offer in terms of author support is difficult.  The other "unknown" is if literary agents take care of this.

Why am I concerned about this?  Because I don't want to market and promote my book myself.  I'm not lazy, but I also don't have a degree in business, marketing and/or advertising.  I'm a writer.  What do I want to do?  Write.

Self publishing is great and kudos to all of the success stories out there.  I am not one of them.  I have made a grand total of $7.79 from e-book sales on top of the $700 or so I made from sales of the hard copies (which was about break even for my cost of printing).  With promotion and all of that I likely could do better but I want to finish my full length novel.

In my eyes a writer who has to do all the work to sell his book is akin to a race car driver having to do his own pit stops.

So, do I want a "Traditional" Publisher?  Well, sort of, I completely embrace e-books and new techniques of  publishing but at the same time I want to be sort of taken care of, given deadlines, told when and where to do signings and have someone else run ads for me.  This is what I am paying you <>80% of my book costs for.

So unnamed book company, if all you are giving me for my book is a small percentage of sales, a few bytes of data space and a bit of paper, no thanks.

Thanks For Reading

P.S.
Check out The Global 50: The World's Largest Book Publishers, 2012
Of note: #8 Random House posted revenue of almost $2.3 Billion last year.

Also of Note:
After writing this I happened to get a tweet from another publisher who will be named (Evolved Publishing) who sound like exactly what I will be looking for when the time comes.

I am going to get a children's story published… PIII

Well, I just have to get an unbiased read through from someone who doesn't know me well (or sleep with me :-) ).

Next I have to write a really kick-a$$ cover letter and send it off.

Is it too early to be excited?  I have decided that I will not be rejected!  That should waylay the doubt for at least three months.

I am going to get a children's story published… PII

Dear readers, it has been two hours since I last confessed…

Perhaps writing what I am going to do first is a good way of actually doing it.  After I wrote my last blog I began researching publishing children's books.  This is what I found:

“So You Want to Publish a Children’s Book: Advice from an Insider” by Victoria Fanning
Some words of wisdom on submitting your work.  Most importantly it answered my question of whether or not it needed to be illustrated.  The answer was an overwhelming NO!

"How to format your manuscript for a children's book" by Cynthea Lui

A step by step guide to how exactly to format your children's book for submission.  Typical double-spaced times new roman nothing fancy.

I also found two three publishing houses that are taking unsolicited manuscripts for children's book:

Houghton Mifflin Harcourt

Boyd Mills Press
Orca Book Pulbishers (Canada Only)

As well as a good list of others that aren't quite what I was looking for but still good to know

So, I have formatted my story as per Cynthea's advice, stopped worrying about the artwork.  I now have two other things to do.

Get someone to look over my manuscript for mistakes/grammer etc. and find out if I can submit to both of these places.  I have heard that some PHs only want you to submit only to them.  

For the record, if you are going to take 3+ months to get back to the submitter (which I completely understand) I don't think it's fair that they have to wait for an answer/non-answer before submitting to someone else.  I know that you believe someone is wasting your time if they submit to multiple places and may decide not to go with you but it is only the time it takes to read/think/write a letter as opposed to three months of waiting.

Here is my goal.  To have my manuscript in the mail to someone by Friday!  Luckily I have two great editors by way of my wife who is an elementary school teacher and my friend Allison who has an English degree.

I am going to get a children's story published…

just don't know how yet.
Two years ago just before my daughter was born I wrote a book for my son called:

My Baby Sister is an Alien

It's a look at pregnancy, birth and early infancy from the perspective of an older brother.

My wife has been bugging me ever since to get it published and perhaps I should.  There are just a few things that I want to find out first.

1. It's not illustrated (well the version I made used clip-art but that doesn't count), do I need to have it illustrated before I try to submit it or will they hook me up with someone?
2. Who is a really good children's book publisher that is taking submissions from unknown hacks like me?

I am going to start some research and let you all know how it's going!

So far I have:

Asked twitter

Googled and read a bit on some of them.

Next, make a list of my preferred publishers and look into submission requirements for each.

Wish me luck!

Thanks for Reading

Dear, Sad Neglected Blog:

I'm so sorry, I have been sadly neglecting you but I have been really busy, writing flash fiction (all of which can be found at Alphabet Wine) running my own flash fiction contest, 3 For Thursday, which is now starting to take off, and preparing for NaNoWriMo.

It has been a very long time since I paid any attention to you but honestly you are in my heart.  You see I was sick for almost a week, then I went to a far off place that had hardly any internet.

I know, I know, that's hardly an excuse.  Would you forgive me if I wasn't paying you any attention because I was writing?

Yes?  Oh… only if I was working on something publishable, darn.  Well no, I haven't, but I will soon, I promise.  Starting on November 1st.  This time, I will succeed with NaNoWriMo, I am going to attend some events and get support from others, both in person and from my Social Networking buddies on Twitter and Google+.  I already made a circle of NaNoWriMoers to keep in touch with.

What am I going to write?  Well, Blog, I am going to solidify my comedy sci-fi adventure I was working on before I got distracted.  I know, I have already written some of it and that's cheating, well, I am going to start over, I don't like what I have.

What is that Blog?  Will I still be doing flash fiction?  Of course I will, but I am really going to focus on my other writing, I may even start up the #6amWriters again and see if I can coax all my #WordMongering buddies out of hiding.

Well Blog, I sure do hope you accept my apology, I promise to keep you up to date on my NaNoWriMo progress and goings on.

I missed you,

Sincerely,

D. Ryan Leask

P.S. Thanks for Reading

Broken ankles are far worse than the pain

Who knew that a fairly minor injury coud turn out to be such a pain in the ass?

Last weekend, on a particularly hot day we decided that we desperately needed to get out of our house and head to somewhere with air conditioning.  My wife, Toni gathered up a few odds and ends (diaper bag, cold drink cups for Starbucks Frappuccinos) while I loaded the kids into our overly hot car.
As I was about to put our son into the car I spotted a lady walking the cutest brindle French Bulldog.  We talked to her and my wife was walking down the path.  Suddenly things went flying.
"I think I broke my ankle."  She said, without uttering as much as a single "F"-word (colour me impressed).  She laid on the ground half sobbing and rocking.  She was almost as panic stricken as our poor neighbour with the dog who asked a few times if we needed her to call 911.
I did what I always do in these kinds of situations which was think it isn't as bad as it looks and just remain calm and figure out what to do (and generally taking too long to set a plan in motion).
I got the kids loaded into the car then drove as close as I could to Toni, without running her over (which would have made the situation far worse, although if done right would have alleviated much pain) and very carefully loaded her into our small car and drove to the hospital.
Luckily her brother was at a baseball game close to the hospital so he was able to get a ride there with his girlfriend and stay with Toni while I looked after the kids.  His girlfriend also was able to come back with me and grab a car so Toni and George could get home.
I was still hopeful that it wasn't as serious as we thought, a twisted ankle, perhaps a sprain.
I got the call.  It was broken.  Okay, no big deal.
Later: May need surgery, oh crap
Still later: No surgery, oh thank God.

After a supper of hotdogs and then putting both kids to bed (not an easy task with a five month old and a toddler that insists having three books read to him, three songs sung and various other things that usually make for a 45 minute - 1 hour bedtime routine on a good day) she returned.
I have seen a number of people with casts lately.  They have these airboot things, it looks like a giant shoe and they hobble around a bit but still pretty mobile.  Toni had told me on the phone that the doctor told her of all the bones to break that the lateral malleolus (the end of the fibula) is one of the best.

BULL-FUCKIN'-SHIT

I was expecting to see Toni gingerly walking up the steps on our deck, looking forlorn but all in all not so worse for wear, I didn't think they even did crutches anymore.  Guess what, they do, and guess what, she had them.

"Aw shit!"  I said to myself, realizing immediately what this meant, our children's primary care-giver was out of commission  not even light duties.  About the only thing she was going to be able to look after was feeding our five month old and even then only if she felt up to it.  She had to keep her leg elevated, she couldn't put any weight on it at all.  They couldn't even tell her how long it would take to heal, a progress exam in two weeks was what she was left with.

I still had four days of holidays left so I called my boss and booked the week off.

I hate to toot my own horn but as a guy I am pretty capable around the house, I can cook, don't mind changing diapers, know where the cleaning supplies are and can take orders fairly well (had this been my father…)

Throughout the week I actually got on a pretty good flow, the kids were angels (as they usually are), I managed to get them out of the house for at least an hour everyday, I prepped meals in the morning and tried to have lots of left overs stockpiled and didn't let things get out of control.  All-in-all I think the week was a great success (I do one day soon hope to be a full time stay at home Dad and this week told me I could probably handle it).

Yesterday I dropped Toni and the kids off with my parents about an hour and a half away for the week so two weeks down.  So far so good but what is going to happen now?

A week is about all my parents can handle with both kids, they may keep our three year old for a bit longer but he's actually pretty independent.  I see a future of hell, the next two months are going to be beyond anything I think I will be able to imagine and I can't afford to take anymore time off work.

To say I am concerned about what will happen is an understatement.

First of all my wife is not a home body.  She needs to get out of the house occasionally.  She broke the ankle on her driving foot, she won't be able to drive for quite sometime (doesn't help that our car is a standard).  To make matters worse she was just getting going with a personal trainer and going to the gym a lot and loving it, this just set that back as well as her mood, poor thing.  At least she got a pedicure just before she broke her ankle.

It's summertime, sitting inside on a cold winter day is bad enough, when it's nice outside and you can't walk it's like dying of thirst on a sandy beach.  You can see water, it just can't help you.  This goes for Toni and the kids, at least we have a good sized backyard, but at three Malcolm still needs a lot of supervision outside and someone to be able to jump at a moments notice.  I can't even pick up all the slack because there will be a million neglected things.

So, I made a decision.  I decided that on top of feeling sorry for Toni, and the kids, that for once it is okay to feel sorry for myself a little bit too in this situation, which is why I wrote this.

I'm done now.

Also to my friends on G+/Twitter/Goodreads/Threadless/Outside World, my apologies if I am too busy to interact with you much in the coming months.  I'm sure you will understand, if not, try breaking your wife's ankle when you have two kids under 3 :-D

Thanks for Reading

D. Ryan Leask

Took a Break From All That Is Writing, And it Was Good

As you may have noticed I haven't really been all that active lately on the writing front.  I finished the first draft of my novel at the end of June and then didn't really know what to do.  I attempted to start editing right away but I didn't think that was a good idea so I moved on to my next project.  I got about 15,000 words into it and lost interest.  What I think I needed was a break, a break from writing, thinking about writing, writing about writing and talking about writing.
Over the past few weeks I haven't been on Twitter much, I think I was somewhat embarrassed about my failure with my story I was working on for NaNoWriMo although I know I have nothing but supportive friends.  I think that the biggest issue however was that after my first draft of "Death By Putts" was finished I just didn't know what to do with myself so I headed off in too many directions and then just stopped everything, but I now have a plan:
(This is what I am holding myself accountable for)

1. Finish Beta Reading for Steve
2. Finish Setting Up and Pimping out my G+ account
3. Work on a Design Idea I have for Threadless
4. Return to my one a day one liners for My "My Brain Farts Stink" Blog
5. Catch-up with friends
6. Re-start editing for "Death By Putts"

This is my plan for the rest of 2011.  I am going to take things a bit slower now.

Thanks for Reading

D. Ryan Leask

Am I F*#king Insane? Camp NaNoWriMo and Editing?

What have I done?
Since I learned about it, I have always wanted to participate in the NaNoWriMo (stands for National Novel Writing Month).  Generally it occurs in November and runs for a month.  The goal is to write a novel in a month, or at least enough words for a novel in a month.  That's 50,000 words or approximately 1667 words a day (yikes, when I put it that way it sounds even scarier!).  I recently found out about Camp NaNoWriMo, it's the same thing except they are trying a year round thing and well, I joined.
Now this in itself isn't that bad except just yesterday (well this morning if you count the rewrite of the ending) I finished the first draft of my first novel.  I set out a goal for myself of editing ten pages a day.  Why did I start NaNoWriMo when I obviously have more pressing things I need to do?

Here is my dilemma.  When I was two-thirds of my way through "Death By Putts" (DbP) I realized there was another story that needed to be told, a story about Gavin Petters, the main character that my main character made his career from.  I had a really cool storyline that needed to come out.  I could have waited until I was completely finished DbP but I really think that story should be read after the one I want to write for NaNoWriMo.  Both would be stand alone and you wouldn't have to read one to get the other but there are certain aspects of DbP that may serve as minor spoilers to my idea (tentatively named "Killing Gavin Petters" (KGP). So, in a spur of the moment decision I joined July's running of Camp NaNoWriMo.  I outlined most of KGP today, after all I do already know the two main characters from writing DbP and that one is complete.

Well anyway you know what they say, all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.

You can find me at Camp NaNoWriMo as DryanRack, I'll be the one attempting to cliff jump into shallow water when I realize that I have bitten off more than I can chew!

Thanks For Reading

D. Ryan Leask

Harper Collins/Penguin/Steadpress here I come! (someday, maybe)



I'm going to have to come to terms with the fact that I am terrible at self promotion.  This was my biggest downfall when I self-published through a vanity press (I just remembered what they're called, I also try not to think that I actually did this because it makes it sound like I was naïve and taken advantage of, which I may have been).  It's not that I don't enjoy promoting myself, I loved doing readings and book signings and would love to do more. I am not shy and I think I'm a born public speaker and incredibly outgoing.  The problem is that I have difficulty setting these things up.  It's difficult to explain where the problem lies.  If everything is set up for me, if I am told I need to be somewhere for a signing or a reading I will go, I will sign, I will read, smile, shake hands, greet people.  A reading is my favourite as the crowd has come specifically to hear me talk.  Signings are harder, especially if I am expected to leave my post or get people to come to me.  I am not a salesman, I am a writer, I will chat anyone up that wants to talk to me, but if they don't specifically want to, I feel like a dork (perhaps it's my lack of retail experience).
Even promoting on twitter feels wrong. I always think I am clogging up the twitterverse and my friends feeds with junkmail.  How much more advertising do I have to do there? I can't even seem to give away copies of my Novella "Counting Down the Storm" (which is available on Smashwords for FREE with the coupon code: JN54B until June 27). I find that when I try to do self promotion I do it in such a sheepish nature that I likely don't get anyone's attention or use humor which if it does lead someone to look at the story they realize that it isn't something humorous and they step away.
The other issue is time.  When I'm not doing my full time job, helping my wife raise our two very young kids, taking care of our two dogs, keeping up with repairs and renovations on an older home, attempting to keep our yard from growing an old car on blocks or writing I am sleeping.  I'm not sure where I would fit in enough time to convince people to buy my books.
It is obvious to me by the lack of response I am getting, lack of sales, lack of reviews and lack of any form of excitement, that I am doing something wrong (even if it's the writing, someone should have said by now, "shut up your book stinks").  I am not giving up on "Counting Down the Storm" (which is available on Smashwords for FREE with the coupon code: JN54B until June 27) though, I will keep doing what I am doing and hope to get at least some interest going.  I still hate to give it away though and after June 27th won't do another freebie for a while.

So, I have come to a conclusion (which will likely change by the time I hit PUBLISH POST and then three-hundred and fourteen thousand times from there until my current WIP is complete), I am going to attempt to get traditionally published next time. Writing Query letters, submitting samples, researching agencies and spending time on the wrong end of restraining orders from agents, can not be as much work as trying to get a few thousand people to read my self-published novel. I think the 15% royalty I will make will be worth it, after all that's not much better than you get at Amazon, and they give you nothing in return.


So fair warning Harper Collins/Penguin/Steadpress you shall know my name (it will be on that list of people that aren't allowed in your building)


Thanks for Reading
D. Ryan Leask

Is Early Morning Writing Right For You?

 

This started out as a response to a blog post by the wonderful horror novelist R.A. Evans (read Asylum Lake).  In his post (link here) he talks about ways to find time to write.  It's some really awesome advice and if you aren't a full time writer (and let's face it only a select few are and likely no one reading this blog).  He has five easy steps.

 

There are two parts to this blog.  My personal foray into early morning writing and steps to be successful in your own journey.

 

 
 
 
How I Started Early Morning Writing 

 

A few weeks ago, before I read R.A.'s blog I did an inventory of my time.  I am a father of two.  My son is a busy 2-½ year old boy who wants to spend every waking hour with his daddy and try as I may to write when he is awake I can't help but give in to his pleas to play or bike ride or do other fun things that little boys want to do with there dads.  My daughter was born in March so she is really new.  My services are needed there a lot as well.  Especially after my son goes to bed.  My wife is struggling getting used to being at home all day and craves my attention in the evenings for some adult interaction even if it's just sitting on the couch, chatting or watching TV.  If I attempt to write after she goes to bed I tend to go a little overboard.  I have been known to write until well into the morning which messes up my day/week/month/mood.  She learned long ago that if she doesn't get me to bed when she goes I may not sleep (I once spent an entire night on the computer designing a track for an online game called line racer).  Good call honey!

 

I also have a day job.  It's not overly demanding and I can get some writing done during the day if I work hard and fast on what I have to do and keep a look out over my shoulder.  This is not optimal and I may REALLY get in trouble some day (I am at work while I am writing this yikes).  So as per Mr. Evan's blog here is a typical weekday.

 

• 7:00-8:00 - Prep for Work
• 8:00-8:15 - Commute (Driving wish I could take public transportation, used to write on the bus on the way to my old job)
• 8:15-12:00 - Work
• 12:00-1:00 - Lunch, I usually spend at least a half an hour writing and eating.
• 1:00 - 4:30 - Work
• 4:30 - 4:45 - Commute
• 4:45 - 7:30 - Spend time with my son, eat supper, do odds and ends around the house
• 7:30 - 8:00 - Put son to bed
• 8:00 - 10:00 - Quality time with my wife
• 10:00-7:00 - Sleep (well as much as I can with a 6week old sharing the bed)

 

Weekends are entirely at the wit and whim of my wife and any free time I can sneak in go into upkeep and maintenance of our home/cars etc.

 

So about three weeks ago I sat down with my wife and we had a very frank discussion about how serious I was about writing and how I felt that I wasn't getting the time I needed to do it.  I would like to say that I feel that my wife is supportive of my writing, and in her own way I guess she is, however she is not willing to sacrifice any of her time with me to let me pursue my passion.  I sat down and thought about what I could sacrifice.  After all it is my passion.  I looked at my schedule.  Sleeping from 10:00 - 7:00?  Sometimes we are even in bed earlier.  Do I really need nine hours of sleep?  I wanted to do two things.  Prove to my wife that I was serious about my writing (she is not without cause to think I may not be, I chased the dream once and abandoned it) and I also wanted to prove it to myself.

 

I'm not sure what other people are like but to me sleep is one of the most important things in the world.  If I could sleep 10-12 hours every night I would.  I had to tell myself that writing was more important than getting 9 instead of 8 hours of sleep.  That is easy to do on the front end but I already expressed earlier why I shouldn't stay up later.

 

Three weeks ago I decided that it was time.  I had to tell myself that writing is more important than sleeping and if I wanted to write 6:00am was the time to do it.  No one is awake, I have until 7:30 before I have to get ready for work (on Saturdays I can sometimes even write until 9:00!) and it's just me and my coffee and a bowl of Shredded Wheat with a little too much brown sugar on it.

 

If You Want to Be an Early Morning Writer...

 

1: Just Do it!

If you are already a morning person than you obviously don't have much trouble getting going.  Me, I find that I have drank an entire pot of coffee before I have gotten the energy to even blink.  You have to realize it's a mind set, a habit you must break, figure out your priorities.  I always thought that getting up before you had to was for old people.  That normal people stayed in bed for as long as they possibly could, calculating what you could shave off time wise to hit that snooze button one more time.  An hour and a half of writing?  That's like ten hits on the snooze button!  STOP IT! If you can't find anything other than some sleep time to sacrifice for writing time you are likely a grown up (I'd use adult but I was that long before I became a grown-up).  As a grown up you don't need to laze around in bed as long as you can.  If you are serious about writing then use this time.  If you have to skip watching the news and go to bed an hour earlier so be it.

 

2: Eliminate Distractions
It is so much easier to surf, hang out on twitter, catch up on e-mail and all the other things that computers are used for.  It's time to pretend your computer is a typewriter.  The computer I use is almost old enough to vote.  I can't hook up to the Internet if I wanted to.  Have an old laptop kicking around?  Use that if you can.  Trust me, early in the morning is the easiest time to click on the little e  (or C or whatever) and then before you know it, it's time for work.  Unplug your computer from the Internet, create a profile that can't access.  Do something that will keep you from turning on the Internet.  This time is for writing only, not even anything writer related (research/marketing etc).  Have your coffee and breakfast ready before you start, feed and walk your dogs, drug your wife, whatever it takes to eliminate anything that will get in the way of your productivity.

 

3: Start With "Mindless" Work
I knew from the get go that there was no way I could write new stuff at that time in the morning.  If you are an outliner, that's awesome.  Don't try outlining, try filling stuff in.  I am not an outliner, I am a plodder.  If I try to plod ahead with my story this early in the morning when I'm not used to hid my face will be in the dirt.  Nothing is more disheartening writing page after page of crap.

 

All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.  All work and no.......... you get the picture.

 

I had a story written in a few notebooks.  I used that.  I just started transcribing it.  It was pretty mindless work and I was able to write almost 1000 words everyday from it.  I'm likely one of a few that actually hand writes much but what you can do is edit, go through your WIP and re-read it.  If you don't want to do that what about rehashing and old story that you've written.  Maybe you have no choice but to work on either your WIP or something new.  Do what you wish, but if you are frustrated that your writing is sub-par take it down a notch.

 

4: No Excuses
I do it six days a week.  I take Sundays off because, lets face it, I'm dedicated but not crazy.  Think of it like your job.  If you stayed up late the night before and were really tired could you sleep in in the morning?  (The answer is no by the way).  You have to tell yourself you are doing this because you are a serious writer.  Explain to those around you that getting up early doesn't mean unloading the dishwasher or taking the dogs for an extra walk or changing a poopie diaper.  If you wake up to a puddle on the floor from a blown pipe think to yourself, if I had woken up an hour later then what?  Go write and deal with it in a hour.

 

5: Be Accountable
Share your writing with people, your S.O., tweet about it, set goals and share them in a Blog with a table.  My goal is to write at least 500 words every morning.  I tried to set up a club on twitter (#6amWriters) where you reported you word count and encouraged others to share theirs.  So far I have only convinced one person to do it one time, I blame it on #pubwrite.  If this could get off the ground it would be a great resource.  I find that it's all fine and good to set your goals and try to achieve them but if the only guilt you feel for not doing it is your own you eventually loose focus and that snooze button starts growing again. 

Thanks for Reading
D. Ryan Leask