So, tonight at 11:42pm I wrote "The End" (actually, I didn't, perhaps I should, anyway…). I'm very proud of myself and the story I managed to puke out. At times, like tonight, it flowed out effortlessly, page after page of text and story, other times it felt like I had to drag my MC behind a bus with a chain. I'm sure I'll see those pages clearly when I edit. That is the next part.
So, if any of you want to know what my story is about, here is a synopsis:
DEATH BY PUTTS
Ed Putts is a middle of the road author, or so he believes and although his books have hit the best sellers list those around him keep telling him that is nothing overly special so he keeps plugging away. He gets paid just enough to make a living for himself in his small condo on the outskirts of the city.
One day Ed gets pulled into a meeting with his agent. He finds himself meeting with his editor and publisher as well and they drop the hammer on him. He's done. No more books, no more money, nothing. His series that he is in the middle of will just end. To top it all of a rotten contract has meant that not only do his books and characters no longer belong to him but neither does his name.
He can't write.
Although he is an established writer he finds himself having to try to start over again with no success.
Ed has made a name for himself writing a series about a suave and intelligent serial killer named Gavin Petters. Gavin Petters is Ed's portal to his own dark psychotic impulses. All of those who had supported his writing have sealed it off. It is just a matter of time before the pressure gets too strong.
A pretty, yet unbalanced woman enters his life and pushes him further down into his dark mind. When he kills her in self defense during a masochistic sexual encounter it sets off a series of events that shows him how dark he really is.
My apologies if the above is somewhat poorly written, it is late and I may have been drinking a little but hopefully it gives you an idea of what I have been doing.
WARNING: The following may contain some sarcasm :-D
So, now that I have finished my novel what am I going to do? What any first time novelist would do who hasn't done any homework, I'm going to query. I already have a list of 75 agents that I am going to send letters to, here is my standard form letter I am going to send:
Dear To Whom It May Concern:
My name is D. Ryan Leask and I have just finished writing my very first novel. As I'm sure you can understand it takes a lot of work to accomplish this feat so therefor anyone who has achieved it must truly be special as I'm sure you will see that I am.
My book is about a writer that kills a bunch of literary people who try to keep him from writing, so you'll likely be able to relate and I know this will be a winner with you for sure!
I haven't bothered doing any editing as I know that you provide such services for me when you chose to represent me, after all I am an author not an editor, lol.
I know it said on your website to send only a query letter/sample chapter but I have included the entire novel to save you the trouble of all the back and forth banter which we likely both agree is pointless. I have one request. It said that I shouldn't expect an answer for quite some time but we both know this is just to keep those that have a really terrible novel from bothering you constantly. I have sent this letter out to a number of other agents so the sooner I hear back the sooner I can look through all the offer letters and give you an answer. I'm certain that asking for at least a high five figure advance would be prudent.
I appreciate your time and look forward to hearing from you very soon.
Author of Death By Putts